Long ago, I used to believe in the “use it or lose it” theory when it came to sex: the more it was used, the more it evolved; if it was not used, it declined.

As time passed, I came to realize that sex, too, exists within a law of life’s finite total capacity.

Women Flocked to a Man Who Shined

There are men who are popular with women. If such men fail to restrain themselves in their youth, they can be caught in the whirlpool of conserving that total life capacity.

There was a brilliant man I met long ago. Even after 30 years, I still remember his first words on the phone, the place where we met, and the situation.

“I’m too busy to come to the Sunoo office. Could you come to a coffee shop near the Samsung headquarters building?”

The first impression I had of him at the coffee shop was that his face shined. Neat hairstyle, good-looking face, clear and intelligent eyes, moderate height, slim build, clean skin. His parents were both doctors, and he came from a good professional family.

He was one of the men with the finest presence among men of his generation.

“So someone this outstanding is becoming our member.”

With that sense of admiration, I returned to the office.

We introduced him to several women. The women liked him and felt attracted to him. At that point, he still seemed innocent, but I think he was already enjoying how desirable he was.

Not long afterward, he got married. He married the daughter of a doctor who was a friend of his physician parents.

And so, he seemed to disappear from memory.

The Glamorous Remarriage Life of a Man Who Had Everything Going for Him

A few years later, he contacted me again. He suggested we have a meal together. I had a feeling what it would be about before I went.

As expected, he said he had divorced.

He said the reason for the divorce was personality differences.

But from what I saw, it seemed more like he had failed to manage his passion.

At that time, he was doing extremely well. His business was going well, and he seemed to be making a lot of money. When a man has good looks, a successful business, youth, and overflowing passion, women naturally gather around him, whether he wants it or not.

Surprisingly, there are not that many places where a remarried man can naturally meet women, especially outside nightlife establishments.

We began introducing him again. No matter what kind of woman we introduced, the response was positive. The managers were also active in introducing him.

He was always confident. His self-confidence was remarkable. In short, he was like a fish that had found water.

There were occasional stories behind the scenes that he often had something going on with female members.

He once invited me out, saying he would buy me drinks. Whenever we met, he told stories of the women he had met, almost like heroic exploits. He was a businessman, but instead of business stories, his meeting episodes became the side dish at the drinking table. As a fellow man, I thought, “So a man can live like this. He really is something.”

That was about how I saw it at the time.

What Did All That Glamour Leave Behind?

After some time had passed, I saw him again. He was no longer the man he used to be. He no longer told boastful stories about the women he had been involved with.

Then, almost in passing, he said one thing.

“I should have met a woman who could have children well and focused on her.”

Those words struck my ears just like the words he had first said when asking me to meet him at the coffee shop.

Ah.

This man had nearly exhausted the vitality of his body through too many encounters.

I know men who stand in contrast to him. They are men from the same generation who also met women around the same time, but were not popular with women.

Because they did not have many opportunities to meet women, they focused on the person they married, had children, and as they grew older and became stable, their late-blooming passion began to show. Now they move around energetically here and there.

I have seen many men for whom youthful popularity with women became poison when they could not manage it properly, and who ended up intoxicated by that poison.

Sex should be shared carefully, used sparingly, and focused where it truly belongs.